Southern Football


What does the average Mississippi State player get on his SATs?
-----Drool.


What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas cheerleaders in one room?
-----A full set of teeth.


How do you get an LSU cheerleader into your dorm room?
-----Grease her hips and push really hard.


How do you get a Georgia graduate off your porch?
-----Pay him for the pizza.


Why do the Alabama cheerleaders wear bibs?
-----To keep the tobacco juice off their uniforms.


Why is the Vandy football team like a possum?
-----Because they play dead at home, and get killed on the road.


What are the longest three years of a Florida football player's life?
-----His freshman year.


How many Ole Miss freshmen does it take to change a light bulb?
-----None . . . That's a sophomore course at Mississippi.


Where was O.J. headed in the white Bronco?
-----Lexington, Kentucky . .He knew that the police would never look there for a Heisman Trophy winner.

AND FINALLY (drum roll and cymbal crash . . . )


Why did Tennessee choose orange as their team color?
-----You can wear it to the game on Saturday, hunting on Sunday, and picking up trash along the highways the rest of the week.